Dealing with Relationship Stress
Relationship problems are another type of "stress" we all experience from time to time. We can experience conflicts with our spouse, children, parents, friends, colleagues, employees, bosses, or even with complete strangers. Many times when we have relationship problems, we often think it is caused by the other party who does not have good behavior or attitudes. However, the problem is we often do not take note that it could be the roles that we play and the attitudes that we exude that causes the relationship problems.
Contrary to beliefs, stress relationships are often not the result of couple not being lovely enough to each other. They are often due to stress and strain caused by problems out of the relationship. Having said that, we need to work on our relationships with other just like how we would work at customer relations. You must work positively to building a good relationship with anyone and NEVER take a relationship for granted. Regardless of whether the conflict is with a spouse, a difficult relative, or a friend, relationship conflict, especially ongoing conflict, can cause a level of stress that has a significant negative impact in several ways.
Relationship Stress Caused By Family Conflict
It may comfort you that you are actually not alone if you often experience conflict with your family members. According to statistics, family conflict is a part and parcel of life and is extremely common. Everyone will experience family conflict somehow in their life. In my own perspective, I feel that family conflict is not caused by a lack of love but rather by a lack of comfort and openness in dealing with the conflict among family members. Regardless of whether the family conflict is due to arguments over the dinner table or a hidden feeling of uneasiness that is not revealed, family conflicts do cause a considerable amount of stress to most people.
Relationship Stress Caused By Girlfriend/Boyfriend - Wife/Husband/Spouses Conflict
Most relationships have their significant conflicts arising when both partners begin to live with each other in a close relationship. Regardless of whether they are your spouse, a domestic partner or simply your current love in your life, all can cause stress. Do take note that I use the word "can" and not "must". It is a known fact that living together can cause some conflicts in the relationship as each of the family members will reveal their ugliness to one another. Hence, it is inevitable that potential conflicts will arise when couples married and stayed together. However, this does not mean that relationship conflicts will definitely lead to stress. In fact, stress arises when both of the couple simply do not want to settle the conflict and have no interest in reconciling with each other.
Statistics have shown that relationship stress within a relationship is usually caused by concerns over money-matters, health problems or disagreements over the raising of a child. My personal advise is that, both partners must always remind themselves of how they first formed this love partnership together. They must remind themselves of how they have come together to build this lovely relationship over the years as this is a vital part to any conflict resolution. By using reminding yourself of how you both have formed this relationship together in the first place, both of you can go a very long way towards lessening the severity of a problem or conflict.
Relationship Stress Caused By Conflict With Colleagues And Bosses
Working in a job is not just about keeping ends meet by earning sufficient income. Our relationships with our colleagues and bosses are important too. If we can develop good workplace relationships with our co-workers, we are actually doing ourselves a favour as our work performance will be better. When we have good relationship with our co-workers, we can make our daily work enjoyable and not so stressful. On the other hand, if your relationship with your co-workers is bad, you will only cause misery for yourself while at work and could turn your normal job into a nightmare.
One very important thing that you must take note is that, at your workplace, like any other place, it is a place where a bunch of people with different personality traits come to work together. Just like you can find a co-worker that is very easy-going and enjoyable to work with, you can also find difficult people at work.
My bottomline is that, respect is the foundation to all good relationships, including relationships with your colleagues and bosses. You just need to simply do your best to avoid offending those with whom you work with. Of course, there will certainly be the occasional prickly co-worker who is very easily offended and there is simply little you can do about that though.
Cure To Relationship Stress
If you want to resolve a conflict, the most efffective way is to LISTEN to the other party. How effectively we listen is at least as important as how effectively we express ourselves. Personally speaking, it is very vital for us to understand the other person's views, rather than just our own, if we want to resolve a conflict. In fact, if you can make the other person feel heard and understood, you can go a long way towards the resolution of a conflict.
By having good listening skills, you can help to bridge the gap of any relationship conflicts between the two of you. In fact, both of you can understand why and how did both of you land yourself in the conflict in the first place. This is important for conflict resolution. Unfortunately, most people do not know how to listen to others, they only know how to talk and argue. Instead of giving your full attention by listening to others, most people will formulate their next response in their heads, thinking to themselves how wrong the other part is and start to find faults with the other party in the conflict. In addition, it is common for you to be so obsessed with your own perspectives and mindsets that you simply have no room to hear the other person's point of view.
The good news is, if both of you can sit down and listen to each other's views, both of you will be on the right track to a resolution in the conflict. The solution must be one that both of you can live with. Both of you must come to a win-win situation and give each other a chance to resolve the conflict together. In cases where the conflict could be caused by misunderstanding, a simple apology can work wonders in bridging the gap for the conflict. By talking it out with each other and giving each other space to explain their points of view, it can bring people closer together and the conflict will definitely be resolved.
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